OVERCOMING LONELINESS

Overcoming Loneliness II

"Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work: If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up! Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone?"1

Continuing our series on loneliness, psychologist Norman Wright in An Answer to Loneliness quotes one lonely woman who said, "I hurt deep down in the pit of my stomach, my arms and my shoulders ache to be held tight . . . to be told that I am really loved for what I am."

"Deep within each of us is the hunger for contact, acceptance, belonging, intimate exchange, responsiveness, support, love, and the touch of tenderness," says Wright. "We experience loneliness because these hungers are not always fed."

For example, a child feels lonely when his parents are too busy for him. But to whom can he turn? The adolescent feels lonely when he feels misunderstood by his parents. A mother of small children feels lonely when she is too busy to have her own needs for companionship met.

When married couples cannot communicate effectively, especially with their feelings, loneliness can cut deeply.

When one loses a loved one through death or divorce or is isolated through illness, he or she feels incredibly lonely.

The elderly, who are often cut off from their families and whose friends have passed away, know the bitterness of loneliness.

People who feel inadequate are often lonely. Because they don't like themselves, they think others don't like them either, so they tend to withdraw, at least emotionally, from other people. Sometimes hidden hostility is a cause for loneliness. The hostile person is angry at people so he prevents them from getting too close through his negative attitude.

Another cause of loneliness is fear—fear of getting hurt, fear of rejection, fear of not measuring up, fear of losing a loved one, fear of failure, and so on. For instance, when Sharon was five her father left home, and she felt rejected by him. Ever since, she has had an unconscious fear that if she ever fully loved another man, he would leave her too. Thus she was afraid to fully love her husband until she realized why she was holding back from him.

To be continued . . .

Suggested prayer: "Dear God, when I am feeling lonely help me to find a loving church/group where I can discover a sense of belonging and feel that I am contributing something worthwhile to others. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully, in Jesus' name, amen."

1. Ecclesiastes 4:9-11 (NIV).

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Acts International - Daily Encounter

OVERCOMING LONELINESS

Overcoming Loneliness, Part I

"The LORD God said, 'It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.'"1

"I'm all alone in the universe. No one really knows me. No one really cares. God—if there is one—is far away. He got tired of the world and moved away. I looked in the mirror today and saw the real me—one hideous scar, an open sore. I'm going to sleep."

These were the words of a brilliant student at a large, well-known university. He was one of the most promising students there. He was exceptionally gifted, handsome, athletic, and popular, and he was headed for an outstanding career in medicine. In spite of all this, he was still a very lonely young man. After writing the above note, he injected poison into his veins and died.

Loneliness, like depression, is one of the plagues of contemporary society. Few escape it altogether. In its chronic form it is a killer. When we were still printing ACTS Encounter brochures, "Overcoming Loneliness," from which this series is taken, was one of the most requested pamphlets people requested.

Time magazine reported some years ago that health studies have long shown that unmarried or widowed people are much more susceptible to sickness than married people. For instance, the death rate from heart disease is five times as high among widows between 25 and 34 as it is among married women of the same age. And the divorced of all ages are twice as susceptible to strokes as are the married.2 I would expect that little has changed since this article was first written.

James J. Lynch, when he was a specialist in psychosomatic medicine at the University of Maryland Medical School, and author of The Broken Heart: The Medical Consequences of Loneliness, claimed that suicide, cancer, tuberculosis, accidents, mental disorders, and especially heart disease are "all significantly influenced by human companionship."

In other words, "loneliness and isolation can literally break your heart." Loneliness is a feeling of not being able to reach another person and his not being able to reach you. It is a feeling of being isolated even though you may be surrounded by people.

Henri Nouwen expressed it this way: the lonely person "cannot make contact; his hand closes on empty air."

To be continued …

Suggested prayer: "Dear God, when I am feeling lonely help me to see if the cause lies within myself and, if so, to seek the help I need to overcome this problem. Also, help me not to withdraw into myself but reach out to others and lend a helping hand to a brother or sister who is lonely too. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully, in Jesus' name, amen."

1. Genesis 2:18 (NIV).
2. Time, Sept. 5, 1977.

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Acts International - Daily Encounter

IMPORTANT RECALL NOTICE

IMPORTANT RECALL NOTICE

The Maker of all human beings (GOD) is recalling all units manufactured, regardless of make or year, due to a serious defect in the primary and central component of the heart.

This is due to a malfunction in the original prototype units code named Adam and Eve, resulting in the reproduction of the same defect in all subsequent units.

This defect has been technically termed "Sub-sequential Internal Non-morality," or more commonly known as S.I.N.

Some of the symptoms include:

1. Loss of direction
2. Foul vocal emissions
3. Amnesia of origin
4. Lack of peace and joy
5. Selfish or violent behavior
6. Depression or confusion in the mental component
7. Fearfulness
8. Idolatry
9. Rebellion

The Manufacturer, who is neither liable nor at fault for this defect, is providing factory-authorized repair and service free of charge to correct this defect.

The Repair Technician, JESUS, has most generously offered to bear the entire burden of the staggering cost of these repairs. There is no additional fee required. The number to call for repair in all areas is:

P-R-A-Y-E-R

Once connected, please upload your burden of SIN through the REPENTANCE procedure.

Next, download ATONEMENT from the Repair Technician into the heart component.

No matter how big or small the SIN defect is, Jesus will replace it with:

1. Love
2. Joy
3. Peace
4. Patience
5. Kindness
6. Goodness
7. Faithfulness
8. Gentleness
9. Self control
Please see the operating manual, the B.I.B.L.E. (Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth) for further details on the use of these fixes.

WARNING: Continuing to operate the human being unit without correction voids any manufacturer warranties, exposing the unit to dangers and problems too numerous to list and will result in the human unit being permanently impounded. For free emergency service, call on JESUS.

DANGER: The human being units not responding to this recall action will still have the SIN defect and will not be permitted to enter Heaven so as to prevent contamination of that facility. Thank you for your attention!

P.S. Please assist where possible by notifying others of this important recall notice, and you may contact the Father at any time by "Knee-Mail".

--author unknown

AllWorship.com

Getting Up

There is no single definition of holiness: there are dozens, hundreds. But there is one I am particularly fond of; being holy means getting up immediately every time you fall, with humility and joy. It doesn’t mean never falling into sin. It means being able to say, “Yes, Lord, I have fallen a thousand times. But thanks to you I have got up again a thousand and one times.” That’s all. I like thinking about that.

Helder Camara - This Day Thought

GOD is watching over us

The Rite of Passage

"For we walk by faith, not by sight." 2 Corinthians 5:7

Do you know the legend of the Cherokee Indian youth's rite of Passage?
His father takes him into the forest, blindfolds him and leaves him alone. He is required to sit on a stump the whole night and not remove the blindfold until the rays of the morning sun shine through it. He cannot cry out for help to anyone. Once he survives the night, he is a man.

The boy is naturally terrified. He can hear all kinds of noises. Wild beasts must surely be all around him. Maybe even some human might do him harm. The wind blew the grass and earth, and shook his stump, but he sat stoically, never removing the blindfold. It would be the only way he could become a man!

Finally, after a horrific night, the sun appeared and he removed his blindfold. It was then that he discovered his father sitting on the stump next to him. He had been at watch the entire night, protecting his son from harm.

We, too, are never alone. Even when we don't know it, God is watching over us, sitting on the stump beside us.

When trouble comes, all we have to do is reach out to Him.

Just because you can't see God doesn't mean He is not there.

- Author Unknown
AllWorhsip.com

God's Rosebud

A new minister was walking with an older, more seasoned minister in the garden one day.

Feeling a bit insecure about what God had for him to do, he was asking the older preacher for some advice.

The older preacher walked up to a rosebush and handed the young preacher a rosebud and told him to open it without tearing off any petals.

The young preacher looked in disbelief at the older preacher and was trying to figure out what a rosebud could possibly have to do with his wanting to know the will of God for his life and ministry.

But because of his great respect for the older preacher, he proceeded to try to unfold the rose, while keeping every petal intact.

It wasn't long before he realized how impossible this was to do. Noticing the younger preacher's inability to unfold the rosebud without tearing it,
the older preacher began to recite the following poem:

It is only a tiny rosebud,
A flower of God's design;
But I cannot unfold the petals
With these clumsy hands of mine.

The secret of unfolding flowers
Is not known to such as I.
God opens this flower so easily,
But in my hands they die.

If I cannot unfold a rosebud,
This flower of God's design,
Then how can I have the wisdom
To unfold this life of mine?

So I'll trust in God for leading
Each moment of my day.
I will look to God for guidance
In each step of the way.

The path that lies before me,
Only my Lord knows.
I'll trust God to unfold the moments,
Just as He unfolds the rose.

--author unknown

AllWorship.com

WHEN THE DEVIL KNOCKS ON MY DOOR

"Resist the devil and he will flee from you."1

A friend recently gave me the following suggestion: "When Satan comes to remind me about my past, I remind him about his future."

One thing Satan does is continually accuse us before God (See Revelation 12:10). He will accuse us, too, of our past in our mind if we allow him to. When he does, however, we can remind him not only about his future in hell, but also that Christ shed his blood on the cross and gave his life to pay for our sins and has washed them all away. So what's there to accuse us of if we have confessed our sins to Christ and asked for and accepted his forgiveness? Nothing. Absolutely nothing.

Because Christ died for us and cleansed us from our sins, we can, in his name, resist the devil and, as James said, he will flee from us. Satan hates the name of Jesus. Be sure to mention it when Satan comes to tempt you. Instead of trying to reason with Satan, just remind him of his future and mention the name of Jesus … and pray a simply prayer, "Help God! Help!"

Suggested prayer: "Dear God, thank you that you have defeated Satan and all his evil emissaries, and that there is power in your name to defend against any and all of Satan's devious ways and to defeat him. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully, in Jesus' name, amen."

1. James 4:7.

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Acts International: Daily Encounter